Only a relative percentage of men will be safe from the micro bikini trend sweeping beaches in Miami, Brazil and Southern Europe.

The microkini originated in the 1990’s but until now it was mostly for nudists and body builders. It’s as though some genius looked at the Brazilian bikini and thought, “We can go smaller.”

A microkini is a bikini so small that it is basically pasties with strings attached to them for decoration. The g-string bottom is barely there enough to cover the inner labia, clitoris, urethra and vaginal opening when you stand in one place and don’t move around a lot. But camel toe is an inevitability walking down the seashore. There are a lot of funny pictures of this happening on Google.

Unknown micro bikini models at the beach.

Since the entire pubic mound is exposed you will need a comprehensive bikini wax beforehand. Unless you prefer to keep it all natural and let everything hang out. And we mean everything.

Keep in mind that that a micro bikini may be legally considered public nudity depending on what state or country you are in right now. They are not safe for work or pretty much anything.

Here are some of the best micro bikinis available to purchase online as of this blog posting. Click on the link to learn more about each product in the online store.

1. American Flag

The Patriotic Micro Bikini ($24) is perfect for barbecues and firing semi automatic weapons.

2. Neon Mesh

This lady always tattoos clients in her Bitsy’s Bikinis Solid Orange Fishnet Micro G-string ($21.95).

3. Nude Blush

Most people will blush when they see you in Bitsy’s Bikinis Nude Teardrop Extreme G-String ($19.95).

4. Heart Hottie

The Heart Hottie String Bikini ($19.95) is like heart-shaped pasties but there is also one for your twat.

5. Leopard Print

The Leopard Print Micro Bikini ($18.99) has trendy clear plastic straps that hold it in place kind of.

6. Crochet Daisies

Wear the Tiny Pansy Daisy Micro Thong ($18.75) with green pasties to create a garden effect.

7. Metallic Gold

The Gold Metallic Micro Bikini Top with White Trim ($12.99) is handmade in the United States.

8. Faux Leather

The affordable Foil Micro Bikini Set ($8.95) comes in metallic green, hot pink, orange, red, silver and gold.

9. All White/Black

Sometimes simplicity is best for a micro thong such as the LinvMe Bikini Triangle G String ($7.49).

10. Pearl G-string

The Deer Mum Women Pearl G String Bikini ($6.99) is more of a “cover up” for a second swimsuit.

If swimwear trends keep going this way then pretty soon everyone will be sun bathing naked. Or it will go the opposite way and everyone will wear a lot of long dresses, petticoats and hats again.

Read more about captain hats, which can be worn with micro bikinis at EDM festivals.